JOKE BUT TRUE:CHURCH ATTENDANCE

By
Attendance in Church on sunday
1. Human beings = 85
2. Bible = 27
3. Phone Charger = 507.
4. Rechargeable lamps = 212.
5. Rechargeable Torch = 176.
6. Power banks 132.          
God is watching .

 Last Seen:

*Whats app*      _*1 min*_ ago🙃
*Facebook*       _*2mins*_ ago☺
*Twitter*            _*5mins*_ ago🙂
*Instagram*      _*10mins*_ ago😉
*Bible*             _*since 2009*_ 🙈
*Beer*               _*online*_😎
God is soaking your cane in crude oil..😀
Go to another group and announce to them🎙
🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

2 TERRORIST COMMANDERS SURRENDER SELVES TO POLICE

By
Image
The Borno State Police Command said on Wednesday that as a result of "Operation Safe Corridor," the counter-terrorism effort of the Nigerian military, two high profile commanders of the Boko Haram militant group have surrendered, along with their families. In a statement to newsmen in Maiduguri by its public relations officer, DSP Victor Isuku, the command said that 13 civilians were also rescued from suspected kidnappers, with two of the hoodlums dying of injuries received in a gun battle with the police. Two AK-47 rifles were also recovered. "The 13 rescued victims were formally handed over to the His Excellency, Alhaji Mamman Durkwa, Deputy Governor of Borno state, today at the Government House," the spokesman said. He noted that with the unconditional surrender to the police of the terrorists, the efforts of the military had recorded another victory. According to the statement, the surrender was negotiated on Sunday evening by the intelligence arm of the Special...
Read more

A story of sex and scam: Lagos sugar mummies’ ‘lucrative’ offers

By
Image
A story of sex and scam: Lagos sugar mummies’ ‘lucrative’ offers    Naza Okoli   Weekend Lagos Along major streets, on pavements beside the roads, on pedestrian bridges, and on notices posted on buildings and walls around the metropolis, there is almost always a note asking you to call a particular number or visit a website should you need a “sugar mummy”. Even though initial information gathered by Saturday Tribune identified Ebute Metta and Gbagada as the major hubs for the business, residents in those areas who were contacted last week said they were not aware. “I have lived in this area (Ebute Metta) for more than twenty years now,” said Thomas Nwike who owns a fashion shop close to Alagomeji. “I know there are sugar mummies everywhere in Lagos; but I don’t think that this place is their headquarters or anything like that.” Covert affair It is not often possible to reach a sugar mummy directly, as many of them are represented by “agents.” It is t...
Read more

PETER MADSEN: DID A DANISH ENTREPRENEUR SINK HIS HOMEMADE SUBMARINE WITH A JOURNALIST ABOARD?

By
Image
The Danish inventor charged with manslaughter over the suspected death of a Swedish journalist wanted to fly into space and once said he was "a curse" on the submarine at the centre of the case. Peter Madsen, 46, was rescued after his DIY submarine, the UC3 Nautilus, sank off Copenhagen at about midnight last Thursday. Swedish journalist Kim Wall, 30, was on the submarine just before it sank and has not been seen since. Madsen said he dropped her off before the sinking, but he's facing a manslaughter charge as investigators search for her body. The story is a big deal in both affected countries: It has been the lead story, or featured prominently, on news websites including Denmark's main English-language newspaper the Copenhagen Post, and Sweden's largest newspaper, Helsingborgs Dagblad — not to mention the international coverage. WHO IS PETER MADSEN? Peter Madsen is a self-taught aerospace engineer who calls himself an "inventrepaneur". He "design...
Read more

TEEN PARENTS ACCUSED OF SMUGGLING THEIR CHILD OUT OF A HOSPITAL FINALLY REUNITED WITH HER

By
Image
A young teenage couple accused of snatching their newborn baby from hospital have been briefly reunited with their daughter after five days apart. Jayden Lavender, 14, and fiancée Jenifer Morrison, 15, smuggled three-day-old Aria out of the hospital in Sydney at 12.30am on Thursday. Their disappearance sparked a huge search before the pair were found safe and well 16 hours later after spending a night camping with the infant. The teens were briefly reunited with their baby girl on Tuesday amid the family's fears they would never see her again. Jayden and Jenifer said they hid Aria under a blanket and left Nepean Hospital in the middle of the night because they feared their baby would be taken into care by social services. But an emotional Jayden told 7News the reunion gave the young couple hope Aria would be returned to them permanently. With his arm around his fiancée, the 14-year-old said: "Definitely brought a smile to my face, I haven’t been able to smile ...
Read more

CORRUPTION - SENIOR POLICE OFFICERS ON PAYROLL OF FRAUDSTERS - POLICE CHIEF

By
Image
Fatai Owoseni Lagos State Police Commissioner, Fatai Owoseni has warned Area Commanders and Divisional Police Officers (DPOs) in the state police command to shun bribery or leave the state, saying that some of them are on the payroll of fraudsters. Owoseni stated this during a lecture on Code of Conduct for Law Enforcement Officers at the Police Officers’ Wives’ Association (POWA) Hall, Ikeja. He warned that the era of impunity and corruption among cops was gone, appealing to his subordinates to come for transfer if they would not want to play by the rules in the state. He said: “I am tired of hearing about shooting or killing of innocent persons. No one has the right to take another man’s life. It is only God that has the right to take life. “It is your responsibility as a DPO to know those who are collecting bribe under you. If you refuse to stop them, they will stop you from being a DPO. “It is embarrassing to see policemen collecting bribes and chasing yahoo yahoo boy...
Read more

WIFE AND STEPSON OF KKK LEADER,FRANK ANCONA CHARGED FOR HIS MURDER

By
Image
Tuesday 14 Feb 2017 The wife and stepson of a Ku Klux Klan leader who was found fatally shot next to a river have been charged with murder. Malissa Ann Ancona, 44, and her 24-year-old son, Paul Edward Jinkerson Jr., were charged with first-degree murder, tampering with physical evidence and abandonment of a corpse following the death of white supremacist Frank Ancona. Both have been jailed without bond. Jinkerson shot his 51-year-old stepfather as he slept Thursday at his home in Leadwood, about 70 miles south of St. Louis, a probable cause statement alleges. After the shooting, Ancona’s body was taken in Jinkerson’s vehicle to an area near Belgrade, about 20 miles away, according to St. Francois County Sheriff’s Department detective Matt Wampler. Jinkerson’s attorney, Eric Barnhart, said he didn’t believe his client was involved in the killing, but declined to comment further. Malissa Ann Ancona, the wife of KKK leader Frank Ancona (Picture: St Francois County Sh...
Read more

EGYPT BLOCKS 21 WEBSITES FROM FUNCTIONING WITHIN IT'S BORDERS

By
Image
Egypt on Thursday blocked 21 websites, including Qatari news network Al Jazeera and Islamist-affiliated platforms, following in the footsteps of Saudi Arabia and the United Arab Emirates. Among those blocked since Wednesday evening is the website of the now-banned Muslim Brotherhood, Ikhwan Online, according to a report in the privately owned Al-Masry Al-Youm newspaper. All websites blocked contain material that “support terrorism and extremism as well as publish lies,” a security source was quoted as saying. The Arabic edition of the Huffington Post was blocked, although the English-language version was accessible. The independent Cairo-based Mada Masr was another site blocked. Since the ouster of the Muslim Brotherhood from power in Egypt in 2013, Egypt’s relations with Qatar have worsened as Cairo slams Doha for hosting members of the now-banned group. Egypt’s Gulf allies Saudi Arabia and the United Arab Emirates blocked the website of Al Jazeera and other Qatari ...
Read more

TERRORISM;NIGERIAN GOVT BEGINS TRIAL OF BOKO HARAM SUSPECTS

By
Image
The federal government says it is ready for its first major prosecutions of suspects linked to Boko Haram insurgency. Trials of the suspects will take place at a military base. The defendants have all been arrested and detained since the start of insurgency in the country's northeast in 2009. The Justice ministry announced last month that some 1,670 detainees would go on trial at a civilian court at a military base in Kainji, in the central state of Niger. A further 651 others at the Giwa barracks in the capital of the northeastern state of Borno, Maiduguri, would then be tried. A government source involved in the process told newsmen that defence and prosecution lawyers have arrived early to prepare for the cases. "But from all indications, the whole of Monday will be used for administrative purposes," he said on condition of anonymity. "It's just about sorting out the record of the suspects to determine who is going to stand trial ...
Read more